The Trap of the Sensitive, Capable Woman

If you’re a sensitive, capable and intelligent woman, you might be stuck in an exhuasting cycle.

Because for many women, capability and intelligence are attributes that are rewarded and celebrated in our world. So often women feel like they need to lead with these attributes in order to “get ahead” in the world.

For feminine-essenced women who are also deep feeling and perceptive, this can feel like a lot.

Because when you’re empathic, you naturally attune to what others need.

And when you’re capable, others usually expect you to do and achieve more.

And when you’re intelligent, you often over analyse and feel overly responsible for everyone and everything around you.

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After working so closely with women’s subconscious beliefs and energetic patterns over the years I’ve seen how this so often leads women to a place of exhaustion, confusion and never feeling quite enough.

Not because there is anything wrong with being perceptive, capable or intelligent. But because often these natural attributes lead to women becoming trapped in the expectations of others (which they then internalise as their own expectations).

Instead of feeling safe to soften into their femininity and natural value, they’ve been taught that they need to hold up the world around them.

And instead of surrendering into being supported, loved and cherished by others, they’ve fallen into patterns of controlling, striving and proving themselves.


Because here’s the thing…

When you’re expected to be everything to everyone → you start over working, over giving and striving to be perfect

When you’re taught that your outer achievements are where your value lies → you become trapped in a cycle of constant doing and achieving.

When you use your intelligence to take the lead or over-analyse in relationships → you start feeling unseen, undervalued or resentful

And when you feel overly responsible for the needs and emotions of everyone else → you start forgetting about your own true needs and desires.

When a woman feels this way, often the natural response is to think that there is something wrong with her for not being able to cope with life. Which leads to an exhausting cycle of unconsciously trying to “fix” herself…

read on

This full piece of writing now lives in the ‘Soften & Bloom ebook’ if you would like to read more.

Belinda x